Sunday, April 24, 2011

The beauty of my [your] messy desk

  I've always had a messy desk.  Just ask my mom.  In first grade, Ms. Abel (who wore the most fabulously 90's bedazzled outfits with matching pins) called my mother in for an intense intervention where I was forced to show her what had become of my little elementary school creak up the top desk.  I remember being quite embarrassed and not understanding how it had happened.  Papers were crunched in the back corners that should have been brought home.  There were pencils, eraser, crayola washable markers, and probably a few fruit snack packets.  We used to make patterns with Elmer's glue in the morning (hearts, stars were for the elite) and then peal them off after recess (sometimes with a layer of the paint from the inside of the desk).  My mom and I cleaned it out and put everything in its place.  The notebooks and books were stacked in descending size order. My crayons, markers, glue all together in a little special row.  And, my pencils were all sharpened and lined together in the happy pencil ledge. 
Thus began my strife to keep a clean desk. 
  It hasn't gone well.  And, today, I am going to make a very sassy declaration.  It is cool to have a messy desk (yeah, I said it).  Now, there are some people in my life (my husby included) who have meticulously-kept desks, and are cool, too.  But I reject the notion that I have a messy life because I have a perpetually messy desk.  [Aside: I do feel really happy for the five minutes after I've cleaned my desk.  But, as my students would say, let's be for realz: I'm not really a tidy desk kind of cat.]
One time, I heard a really great quote that I thought resonated with my thoughts because it was a part of my ridiculous justification [read: bargaining] of having a messy desk.  It went something like, a messy desk belongs to a creative mind.  True, true.  I have a creative mind, for sure.  I also have a little OCD, though, so the part of me who wants everything just so fought with the idea. 
   But then, a few weeks ago, while I was working late, I stood up to start to clear my desk (I'm sure I'm judged at work for my messy desk, but as Dr. Suess said, "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."  [another aside: I believe in thoughtful actions and words, I just think that if someone thinks I'm lesser for my messy desk, they don't really matter to my identity.]  So, I started tidying up my desk to achieve my five minutes of very temporary post-clean happiness and I had a beauty moment.  My desk was like a piece of art, a still-life, literally.  And, it can only be this deep piece of art to ME.  MY desk.  My things, put there from my fingers, in my life, in this time, in this amazing job of being a teacher.  I spend many many hours at this desk, and I have a messy, yet beautiful "process" of really living at my spot in the world.  I'd love to take a trip back and take a picture of that first grader's desk and all of my messy desks since then.  They'd be more raw than diary entries. 
  Enjoy YOUR messy desks, my creative friends!  [hopefully this post will not haunt me as I pursue being a prop stylist.  eek!]

  [not: before looking at these pictures, understand that this is WAY messier than usual (seriously).  I had reached a pinnacle of messiness.]  But instead of judging myself, I would like to work on having a balanced messy-meets-creativity working space and embracing the fact that I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL MESSY DESK.
This is the SECOND before I gasped and said, "Okay, this is pretty bad, I need mom and Ms. Abel again to get me back on track."

The most dramatic revelation of my messy nature: the two plastic spoons in my tea cup and the fallen kleenex box.  Why?  Why not just put the kleenex box where it won't continually fall?  Idunno.

My normal beautiful mess does include this cup with it's handmade paper flower made from book pages (from a student), my pink ribbons, and favorite green papermate pens in a cute Target mug.

My desk isn't the only messy yet beautiful creative thing.  My Paper Source planner also reveals my secret.

2 comments:

  1. Loved this, Megan! Also, I'm scared at how similar our desks look/looked. We even have the same pair of scissors, computer in the same position, and paper shopping bag in the spot under the desk. Freaky freak out.

    ReplyDelete
  2. P.S. Do you have a food drawer, too?

    ReplyDelete